Widows in Nigeria are looked upon like charity cases.
When a woman’s husband dies, especially in Nigeria and other African countries, they face a lot of things from family members and friends. The stigma and bad treatment still exists in some parts even though some of the traditions have been abolished.
For those that are close to our mums that go through things like this, we have tales that may probably sound untrue to some people. Read how to deal with a loved one here.
Here are 5 things widows in Nigeria can relate to:
1. You need to get a man
Widows in Nigeria are expected to get a man to solve their financial problems because their husbands are dead. Did they tell you that they don’t have money? Did they tell you that they don’t work?
If she needs some financial assistance and goes to beg someone, they start telling her all sorts of rubbish,
“You need to get a man to solve all your worries. You can’t be suffering like this”
There are so many tales of the brothers of the deceased forcefully taking the widows in a bid to “protect and take care of them”. Who sent them work?
2. Anything you need, come and tell me
This sounds like a very gracious statement but has been turned around as words of resentment. You will see some people being surprised that the widow doesn’t call them for assistance. If you really care about their welfare, why don’t you make the call? Why don’t you offer help?
You know the challenges families face, why don’t you offer to take care of one thing for them instead of waiting for the woman to come begging at your feet to massage your ego?
3. How are you paying fees?
She is plucking money on the tree. She is growing money in her garden. Money is falling down from the sky. Since you can’t mind your business or help them out.
A lot of widows have high paying jobs or businesses that they can survive on. Not every widow is poor.
4. I am not using it again. You can have it
Because widows are now charity cases, abi?
You have a dress that you can’t even wear to stay at home or a bag that has peeled all over, and the only thing you can think of is to dash the widow. In your mind, she’s a charity case and doesn’t deserve to wear anything of quality because of her marital status.
5. She has money o. Are you sure she is not sleeping around?
This is simply the worse. Once a widow starts looking pretty and buying properties for herself, everyone starts thinking that she has a man giving her money.
Can they do that to a man?
Do you have similar experiences? Please share them in the comment section. Don’t forget to share with friends and family.