Sex is a forbidden topic in most Nigerian Households
If you are being very honest with yourself, did you ever learn anything about sex from your parents?
90% of us do not.
It’s so bad that many of us can’t even talk to our parents about sex, especially in our teenage years, and so we seek advice from our inexperienced peers who feed us with their own idea of what sex is, whether it’s wrong or not.
Nigerian Parents make sex look like a sin. I understand their fear that makes them want to shield us from reality. They’re afraid of their kids making bad choices, and I totally understand. They now try to teach us these things from a point of fear.
My problem is that they shouldn’t shield us from truth. Most of us can’t even imagine our parents having sex, and never even seen them kiss before. They only hug on Valentine’s day or birthday anniversaries…. Or church!
If your experience is like this, you are not alone.
Here are 6 ways Nigerian Parents teach you about sex:
1. “Who is that boy/girl?”
This is always their first reaction when someone visits you. They don’t want to know who they are. As long as you’re a girl and they’re seeing a boy, and vice versa, they’re automatically your boyfriend and girlfriend. Then the epistle starts:
- See how you are following boys up and down
- You are too young to start following girls
- Your education is not important. If you get pregnant, I will not train anybody o
The talk is not proportional to the cause at alllllll………
2. If you miss your period, you’re pregnant
The kind of scare they give girls about pregnancies and STDs is so alarming. They teach us nothing about safe sex even in marriage. Condoms is a no-no. If your parents are liberal enough, you may hear about contraceptives.
Periods can be delayed for a lot of reasons, but two common reasons are either the girl is having irregular cycles, or she experienced excessive stress or trauma that month that de-stabilised her. She may even have an ailment.
Nigerian parents will start asking you who the father is.
3. They never talk about it
Like I mentioned earlier, our parents tell us nothing about sex. They never teach you things like how to improve your sex life like it’s done here. They leave it to our peers and biology teachers, and somehow somehow, they expect us to turn out right. When we eventually do, they claim that their strict principles and moral standards guided us.
In their mind!
They don’t know that it’s God that’s holding person…
4. Quote holy scripture whenever we bring up kissing or sex
Just bring up the topic of sex or kissing by mistake. Our Nigerian parents will begin to quote holy scripture.
Fornication is a sin. God’s children shouldn’t even be thinking about sex. All they have to do is love God, and focus on their studies.
They now start giving you examples of how other people’s children got pregnant and destroyed their future.
We know that what they’re saying is right, but what do we do when hormones are raging, and when we are experiencing the effects of puberty?
We have a lot of questions, and our parents are unwilling to answer most times. Kissing and sex are forbidden topics abi, because God threw us down from heaven and somehow somehow we landed in your family. When we finally get married, you’ll now be asking for grandchildren.
We don’t know what you’re talking about o. In fact, what is sex? What is man and woman?
5. Children out of wed luck = marriage
This is one scare they use to threaten us, and this is why a lot of girls do abortions to hide the shame from their parents.
Now, I am not condoning pre-marital sex, neither am I saying that getting kids out of marriage is ideal. But the shame and castigation that comes with it from Nigerian parents is crazy. People make mistakes, so don’t tell them that they have to marry their partners to save their face, which in reality, is saving yours.
6.Change the TV when kissing and sex scenes occur
It’s only when they’re kissing or having sex that Nigerian parents remember PG18.
In fact, the reactions at this point are so priceless. They either start talking about some random thing just to distract attention, covering their faces, coughing, telling you that whatever you’re seeing on the TV is not real, sending you to the room, or sending you on one unnecessary errand.
We know what they’re doing eh…
You’re just wasting your time.
What are other ways your parents taught you about sex? Share the gist in the comment section below. Don’t forget to share this to friends and family.